Friday, August 5, 2011

Somebody To Love

I have four classes today - September 26, 1991. I'm assistant English teaching here at Wakakusa Chu Gakko (Wakakusa Junior High School) here in Ohtawara-shi (Ohtawara City), Tochigi-ken (Tochigi Prefecture), Japan.
I'm still feeling bloody tire... a feeling I haven't been able to shake for maybe three months now.
Last night's squawk with Ashley my current friend-with-benefits and former ex-girlfriend. It didn't hurt, but it sure didn't help me get to sleep because all I could think about was how great it was. Ashley may never achieve my level of whit, but she seems to know how to get me going, just as I do her. It kills me that we aren't a couple anymore.
Some of the girls in the third-year class drop by the teacher's office with a Where's Waldo book. As luck would have it, I actually have a copy of Mad Magazine with me that has a parody of Waldo! They think it's sick but very funny.
Comedy! Ahhhh... it really does break down a language barrier! I think it's how I have managed to not only survive but somehow thrive these past 14 months in Japan.
Back at home, I try to relax. My eyes are dead tired, but I watch a lot of videos from back home in Toronto.
Kevin - that poaching bastard calls me to discuss the events of last Saturday night. That was when I asked Matthew (and his girlfriend Takako) to intervene on my behalf to get him the hell away from the Japanese foxy  woman who was trying (successfully) to pick me up. As soon as he started speaking his fluent Japanese, I had lost. Why would a woman want to struggle with broken English and Japanese when she could talk Japanese?
The obvious answer would because she would have been with me.
I wish it were that simple.
Sometimes I think the Japanese women would just like to score with a gaijin (foreigner)--any gaijin--just to say that they have done it. I think that's why every single guy who goes to Japan (with me being the lone exception) has come here thinking that having a Japanese girlfriend is the first thing they need to do.
I don't know if that's true. I never asked a Japanese woman, as I was always too busy grunting and rutting.
I know that's a contradiction... but I had zero expectations of anything upon arriving here except that I was probably going to die because I had no idea who to shop, cook, clean, launder... anything - plus I had never had sex before... so why have any expectations except more failure?
Also... I had hooked up with Ashley on my second day in Japan - not knowing that she lived in the town next door, or even what her name was until 24 hours later.
Anyhow... why would I want to talk with Kevin. I am so angry, but tell him I am too tired to talk. I wonder if he understands just how pissed off I am? I hope so.
I had spent the first 24 years of my life being picked on and put down. Once I hit college, I changed and vowed that would never happen again. It's why I fight back... or at the very least seek revenge.
Childish? Maybe. But that's me.
My buddy Matthew calls, telling me that Takako is going to move out and live in Utsunomiya-shi (Utsunomiya City), the capital of Tochigi. He says she is moving out tomorrow. Oh.
He's very vague on the details, but I would suppose something happened at home. I don't press him for details despite every fiber of my journalistic being demanding I do so. He's my friend and I know he's hurting - hell, I am too... Takako has been nothing short of a godsend as a friend for me, too. I figure if there is more to all of this Utsunomiya stuff, then Matthew will tell me when he's ready.
Next on the new assistant English teacher Japan Exchange & Teaching (JET) Programme list is yet another woman.
It's Letiticia. I wanted to wait a while before calling her because she is just so god-damned beautiful, sexy and smart and dammit all to hell, every single guy who wasn't just interested in Japanese girls wanted to be with her. Hell... me, too. But this wasn't a girl I could simply dazzle with bullcrap. I had to let her see what Japan was like first.
It had only been two months for her here in Japan. I figured she would have been hit on by every single Japanese male in the prefecture... and she was. Despite many being handsome devils, not one could measure up to the leggy 5'-11" brunette goddess with gorgeous curls down past her shoulder blades.
She had curves in all the right places, had a wicked smile and beautiful brown eyes that made me melt whenever I looked at her face and those gorgeous cheekbones. She was the total package, and every bit the looker.
If I thought I would have a shot before, I would have taken it.
I just figured that time in Japan would help even the odds in my favour. She had already noted that she didn't want to date a Japanese man. Preconceived notion, perhaps. Or perhaps she was just afraid of being in a relationship with a sexist pig. Hello... every single healthy heterosexual guy on the planet looks at a woman as a sex-object. Every single one of them. I was an above average healthy heterosexual guy... but despite being okay-looking, I felt that Letiticia was out of my league. Kind of like Kristine... my one woman I would give anything to have dated - as a real couple.
But here's the thing about Letiticia. Although she had only first arrived here in very late July (28th or something like that)... she had already gone back home to the USA. She had gone for a week, and was back a day ago... which was why I called her this evening.
Tonight she seems a tad giddy - or air-headed... but perhaps it's jet-lag... or maybe I make her nervous... in that good way (he's so handsome and he wants to ask me out) or the bad way (he's creepy and he wants to ask me out).
Like I said... she went home last week... and guess what? She bought ME some comic books because I said I love them... including Donald Duck - my personal favourite because he doesn't wear pants! That made Letiticia laugh and snort for the first time in her life when I mentioned that joke to her a month ago.
I don't know WHY she went home. Homesick. Needed some medical stuff done... whatever. She wasn't offering and I wasn't prying.
There's a theme isn't there?
She says she'll save them for me when I come and visit her. Is she serious? If I start riding my bicycle now, I could be there by 3AM! If I knew where the hell I was going, of course... but I'm pretty sure I could find her if I focus in on the apple blossom smell of her hair.
With Letiticia... I am in 'severe like'. I remember that I got that term from the Humber College hottie Carloyn Chaulk. She was sexy! I hope she has done well in life.
James "Jimmy Jive" Dalton (another JET newbie) calls me up with an update on the travel plans for us. He - after two months -  is already a great friend. He's the only guy on the program funnier than myself - thank god he can't write or this whole blog would be a complete waste of time and energy.
You know it takes an hour to write these blogs on MY life... but up to six when it's something special like the MISS UNIVERSE one or the one on GEISHA or SAMURAI? Word.
James says that no matter what, December 26th is our departure date. Cool! We're either on for Singapore or Thailand. If it's Thailand, I know two lucky ladies who are going to get another opportunity to spend quality time with me... and each other. James is a good-looking guy... he can find two of his own.

Somewhere Waldo is found,
Andrew Joseph
Today's blog title is by Jefferson Airplane: SLICK... plus here's the original version when Grace Slick was in The Great Society: ORIGINAL. The original is psychedelic... but it's from 1965... and not acid trippy as the later version. The Great Society version is LIVE... and the title is the same as the blog.... however, The Great Society studio version was originally called: Someone To Love.
And that's your history lesson for the day.

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